I’m about to be real honest. These last few weeks have been really hard.
A morning last week, I walked passed Ryan, and he asked “what’s wrong?” and all I could say was “my brain sucks today.” He didn’t know that the entire morning, every critical, harsh thing I’d ever heard had been running on repeat in my mind that morning.
But I put a smile on and went about the day. My resiliency and God’s Grace carried me through that one.
The truth is. For a while now, I’ve had this pressure in my chest, this pit in my stomach, and my breaths have been really short. I’ve had to remind myself that “I’m okay” almost every day, and when I wasn’t convinced, I would go straight to God in prayer.
Life is hard. Anxiety sucks. People aren’t the greatest. But God is the giver of life and breath.
A few days ago, I got my first full breath and I wrote a note in my phone that said “I can breathe again.” Of course, that same night I experienced one of the worst anxiety/panic attacks of my life. The full works. Couldn’t breath, sweating all over, seeing stars, the whole 9… but then it was over. I was exhausted and forced to rest.
The thing about rest is that it is healing at its very core. Your mind, body, and soul require rest to regenerate ourselves to get back out there and do all the things.
I’m not one to share during the struggle, but I’m hopeful that I’m at the end of this latest journey with anxiety, intrusive memories, and negative internal dialogue.
Today, I’m claiming victory over negativity. Over anxiety. Over anything that comes my way that isn’t directly from God.
I’m claiming His power, purpose, healing, and provision in each and every step I take. & I’m sharing a little detail of my story, as an act of faith, that this season is over.
If life is hard right now…
If your brain sucks…
Trust. It gets better.
and it’s always easier to fight your battles when you give them to Jesus.