Part 1 of 2: Choosing to Be Fabu(less) This Year

My mother has always said “less is more”…. and y’all, I have always kinda struggled with that. Like I agree with the concept, but I also am like all or nothing, usually all. So there’s a conflict trying to have less when I think I need all the things. 

At the beginning of this year, I set out to be Fabuless…. and no I didn’t forget how to spell fabulous, I just redefined what the word means to me. 

Fabuless: to do more with less, fabulously

Yeah, I made that up. But just go with it for this post and next lol Take my make-up regimen for example. I’m a bare-faced babe or I’m a dolled-up glam queen. I don’t do the whole natural make up thing well. Like if I’m gonna go all-natural, I’m just not gonna wear makeup. Same with my style and my hair and events that I host… it’s all or nothing baby. 

Oh and dinners. Like I’m sorry, but I am not good at simple. When I prep our dinner table, I plan for all the fixings, fully plated dinners… and it’s not because I’m an overachiever. It’s because I don’t know where to stop. 

So… less is more. 

Let’s break that down. If less is more, then why do we need all the snacks, all the things, the newest and latest of everything, all the accessories, blah blah blah… why?!!?

Pause… so obviously there is a thing with not being truly content and needing more. I totally recognize this as a huge problem in our society. But stop and focus just on you. At what point is enough truly enough? At what point are you truly satisfied? 

I don’t know. 

Seriously. That’s my answer. I am just as happy decked out at a super luxe event as I am when I have the bare minimum in my pack roughing it in Nicaragua. The difference? My surroundings. It’s easy to be content with nothing when everyone has nothing. It’s a little harder to be happy with less when you feel like you need to have more to keep up with people. 

And y’all, it took me a long time to realize this, but people don’t care if you are keeping up with them. Honestly. They just don’t. Your friends care if you show up, if you’re present, and if you’re happy. They don’t care if your stuff is as fancy as theirs… like they just don’t, and if they do, get new friends because that’s not cool. 

Back to less being more. 

The best trip I ever went on was when we spent a week in Thailand. I didn’t carry a purse. I wore the thinnest clothes I could find, and we kept it stupid simple. The most important thing was that we soaked up every moment. We did a beach day where we went beach hoping to like 5 different beaches, and there were times when I didn’t even take a towel. I just laid in the sand and let it happen. It was the best. We literally didn’t have a single care in the world. 

So, obviously it’s easy to be super chill on vacation, but what about real life? How can I get that Thailand vacation mentality here in my busy day to day??? How can the girl who is overly prepared for anything that could possibly learn to chill out and let life happen? 

Three simple words: less is more.

When I’m not so focused on what could happen, I get to be a part of what is happening. When I’m not carrying all the things, all of em, in my bag, I am less weighed down. Literally. When I’m not worrying about if I have everything I’ll need, I can be truly present in every situation. 

My husband has this thing he says when he leaves the house every day: keys phone wallet. That’s it. That’s all he needs for his day. Three things. 

  1. His keys 
  2. His phone
  3. His wallet

And he never worries about bringing all of the other things that I’m over here trying to find in case I want a snack or get a headache or have a runny nose or want to sit and read for a bit or maybe get a little oily on my forehead 😂 y’all know what I’m talking about. My purse is full of what if scenario fixes… and it’s not just my purse… it’s my life. 

My brain is full of back up plans and alternate routes preplanned. Like I’m so busy planning for the worst that I can’t even see the moment when it’s right there in front of me.

So, my year of being Fabuless is off to a great start. I’m learning how to not have all the things all the time. I’m letting go of those many security blankets that I rely on so much, and I’m embracing the unknown like walking out of the house without 150 life hacks in my back pocket. I’m just living, and I’m choosing to do so with a little less, and it’s wonderful. 

Another word that I’m thinking of as I wrote this is effortless. The best moments in life are effortless. There the conversations that you didn’t plan to have. The honest candid pictures that show pure joy. The accidental meetings that soothed your soul, and the plans you didn’t make. 

You can be a boss babe and still be fabuless. You don’t have to let go of all of your structure to enjoy life with a little less. Just be realistic and declutter some of the stuff that isn’t directly pouring into your wellbeing and your life. Leave it behind and see how it goes.

Part 2 of this post is already written and in the editing process. It will drop next week, and it’s packed with reasonable and very realistic ways on how to declutter your life so that you can live a little more simply and break free of some of the unnecessary distractions we often deal with on the daily.

– the Wife 

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