Family/Relationships

How to Make Your Cup Runneth Over

My favorite movies of all time are from the Transformers trilogy. While the first one will always hold a special place in my heart, the third was also pretty phenomenal. I’m not obsessed with the second one like I am the other two, but it still has some amazing action shots of Bumblebee kicking butt, so there’s that. Anyways… These will undoubtedly always remain my favorite movies of all time.

However, my favorite chick flick or romantic movie of all times is Hope Floats, and yes Harry Connick Jr. may be a huge factor as to why I am in love with this film. My mom shared this movie with me when I was a little girl, and we just swooned over the magical love story that developed between Birdee and Justin, like really swooned. Aside from those two, one of my favorite roles was played by Gena Rowlands (Ramona Calvert, Birdee’s Momma, Missy!) One of her lines in the script read, Oh, honey. My cup runneth over, and ever since I was a child, I have been seeking that feeling.

I remember the very first time I heard her say this during the scene where Birdee’s daughter (Ramona’s granddaughter) looks up at Romona and says, I love you, Grandma., and Ramona’s response to her little granddaughter is this: Oh, honey. My cup runneth over. This moment is the epitome of one’s relationship with their grandmother, or at least it should be. It definitely was that way for my grandmother and me, and I know it was for my mother and her grandmother.

This moment of feeling that your cup has runneth over is such a coveted experience. I’ve seen it happen first hand with couples during the moments of them reciting wedding vows, and with my brother and sister in law when they had their first child. I even saw it happen with my dear friend Victoria the night she was crowned Miss North Carolina. In all of these instances, their cup was running over, and their hearts were so full that it was actually overflowing.

I’ve been blessed to have moments like this in my life, and in those moments, I recognized exactly what was happening to my cup. When my younger brother slayed in his Senior Night football game, my cup ran over. He’s always been the little apple of my eye, so naturally, any of his personal victories felt like victories for me also. The day my husband proposed to me, my cup really ran over, like beyond anything I had ever experienced up to that point. Every time I visit Nicaragua on a short-term missions trip, my cup overflows immensely. The joy and the love that the kids pour into me is indescribable, and until you experience it, I dare say it’s unfathomable.

But how do we get more of this? How can we make our cups run over more often? It’s simple. Live a life that you love to lead. Create opportunities for your heart to be full. I think of our lives and our relationships with other people as little cups. For example, my relationship with my husband is its own little cup, and the more goodness that we pour into it, the more goodness that will run over and spill into other aspects of our lives. Contrarily, any bad or negativity that pours into the cup will block out the goodness that’s poured in and out will flow a stream of negativity in your life.

I was working with a couple recently who were having some challenges in their relationship. The husband expressed that his wife is constantly nagging and always has something negative to say even when he tries to be positive. His question was this: How do I keep pouring in good when all she pours in is bad? This is an incredibly reasonable question to ask, and I’m sure most spouses feel like this at some point in their marriage.

The answer is simple. Pour in so much more good that it flushes out all of the bad. Eventually, the cup will runneth over, and a steady flow of goodness will be flowing. My advice was to outlove her negativity. Don’t confront it, don’t argue with it. Just completely outlove it, and eventually, she will become weary of suffering and she will begin to float in the beautiful river of love and positivity.

To our cups, may they always runneth over.

– the Wife

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